A Life Experience

For a little over two years now I have been keeping a journal that records how I have felt the Hand of the Lord in my life. I haven't written anywhere near daily... but have done so regularly. For Christmas this year I gave a copy of this journal to each of my children. Following is a true story written in that journal. It happened years earlier but I hadn't yet recorded it. It is quite long... but one that has had a profound influence on my life. I hope you enjoy it.

On Christmas of 1998, I received the biography of President Gordon B. Hinkley. It was a new book at the time and was popular in LDS circles. Since I had some time during the Christmas break, and we had just finished another successful business season, I devoted some time to reading it.

As I read the pages of this book, with its many remarkable stories, I began to be impressed how many programs in the church, as we currently know them, were the result of the efforts of this one remarkable man. Each time I would finish a reading session, I would put the book down and think to myself “one man really can make a difference!”

As I began pondering on my own life, I began to wonder what I should do to contribute more to the Kingdom of God. Many thoughts ran through my mind. Dominating my mind was the feeling that I should devote some time to teaching in the Church Education System.

As a college student at Utah /State University, I had taken all the necessary training courses to be a CES teacher but had never followed through with the student teaching portion. It was something I always had in the back of my mind. Perhaps the time was right.

Not knowing how to proceed, I decided to call my friend Jon Stevenson, the CES director in the Washington DC area. I asked how one goes about being a CES teacher. He explained that most teachers are hired after training at one of the Utah Institutes. The training I had years before was no longer valid. He asked “Why don’t you think of being a volunteer in your area?

Our area already had Seminary teachers so my only option was teaching an Institute class. I asked Jon how I should proceed. He informed me that he had a colleague in his same position in the Baltimore area, Brother Earl DeChamps: He suggested I give him a call. I asked if it were strange to call and essentially volunteer? He said “if someone in my area did that, I would fall off my chair.”

Ironically I had a related thought just a couple of weeks prior to this. In Sacrament meeting, a young returned missionary in my ward, Jared Muccaroni, had been called as the Young Single Adult representative for our ward. I thought to myself at that time “what a joke, what young single adults do we have?”

I called Bro. DeChamps on the phone and introduced myself. I explained to him what I wanted to do. He was happy to meet with me a few days later. In our meeting he explained to me that one of the biggest jobs of teaching Institute was recruiting. I then asked him what his expectations were. He replied “If you start out the semester with two students, and end the semester with four, I will consider you very successful”.

I followed all the necessary steps and got a call officially from the Ward. Soon afterward I began to make the class known among all the YSA in the ward.
This included both active and in-active members. I wrote individual letters and made phone calls and visits. Most of the contacts I made seemed to be excited.

I don’t remember how many showed up the first week, but I do remember that before long, we had 12 to 18 attending regularly. This gave me a great deal of satisfaction. More than anything, I was excited for the kids. Many hadn’t been to church in years. Others were looking for an excuse to come back. Anyway, the group became very strong, very quickly. Soon they were spending a lot of time together outside of Institute. It was a wonderful experience for all involved.

I continued recruiting throughout the Stake and made visits to neighboring Wards. Also the kids invited their member and non-member friends. Our class continued to grow. I remember one time having 29 kids in attendance!

Needless to say, Bro. DeChamps was impressed. At some point in the year he explained to me that he would soon be retiring and he felt it would be appropriate for me to take over his position. This seemed to be exactly what I was looking for. He explained that he had forwarded our success to his superiors and that they were interested in talking further. He then explained however that I need to go to Salt Lake for training if I really wanted a shot at it.

After discussing the possibilities with Ann and my children, we made arrangements to let someone live in our house, while we moved temporarily to Utah. The CES people in Utah were very accommodating. I learned that I was going to be able to take both training courses simultaneously. Normally they were taken two semesters in a row. In addition, I was given the opportunity to do my student teach at a local High School at the same time. This seemed to work out perfectly for us.

I really began to feel that everything was lining up perfectly for this position. To top it all off, the house we rented in Holladay was directly across the street from one of the 5 World Zone Leaders in the CES program. He was impressed by my willingness and by the many sacrifices I and my family were willing to make. In January of 1999, my family and I rented a U-Haul trailer and moved to Utah for the duration of six months.

While in Utah, we had many wonderful experiences. We had a fabulous ward and had many friends in it. My children were able to attend a private school based on LDS values. We were able to live near grandparents and others that we hadn’t had the privilege of previously. We really enjoyed ourselves. However, it was our hope that I would still be able to go back to Maryland to take over the CES Director position in my area.

I wish to relate a couple of very personal experiences I had during this time.

Prior to moving, I was in the habit of listening to talk radio while in my car and while working outside. I enjoyed the many topics that were discussed by the various hosts. One of these discussions was on the topic of lawn mower accidents. I remember the guest on the radio, who was a podiatrist, telling of the many series injuries he had personally treated due to young children operating lawn mowers. He stated that he would “never let anyone under the age of 13 operate a mower”.

I took this to heart and I mowed my own lawn. Since most of our furnishings in our rented home were borrowed, we had an old beat-up lawn mower. Week after week my daughter Krista, then about 11, would beg to mow the lawn. After prolonged begging, I consented. I allowed her to mow under strict supervision.

Before long, Krista became quite good at mowing and I began to give her more freedom to mow on her own. One day I remember getting her started in the back yard of the home we were renting, and I went around the front to pull weeds. I remember cutting through the house to the front yard. As I approached the front door I head a blood curdling scream. I dashed for the back yard.

It appeared that due to the age of the mower, the vibration of the engine caused the muffler to fall off. Not knowing what it was, Krista picked it up, instantly burning her hand and fingers. I remember rushing her into the house to run her hand under cold water. She was screaming hysterically. I could see that the heat had literally melted part of her skin on her fingers and that it was blistered and swollen. I recall that the skin was even broken in one area.

As I began running cold water over her hand, the Spirit told me very strongly to give her a blessing. I seemed to reply in my mind, “I will, but first I need to give her first aid”. A second time much more forcefully the Spirit said “Scott, I am teaching Krista a lesson here… not you; now , give her a blessing”. This time I obeyed! I proceeded to give her a blessing by first anointing her with oil, and then sealing the anointing with a blessing. The spirit commanded me to tell her to be made whole. At the close of the blessing, I testify that Krista was made whole. The skin was restored and she was pain free. The following day there was very little sign of the injury.

Since no one was around to witness this miracle, it was unknown to other members of our family. In Family Home Evening the following Monday, Krista and I told of the events of that day. I distinctly remember my older daughter Melissa saying afterwards “Cool stuff like that never happens to me”. Little did I know how those words would be remembered.

Early in the spring or summer of that year, Melissa and Krista were invited by their best friends from school, to accompany their family to Lake Powell where they owned a house boat. The girls’ names were Sage and Shanna Gardner. Sage was Melissa’s age and Shanna was Krista’s age.

For some reason I felt very uneasy about letting Melissa go on this trip but I kept assuring myself that it was all in my mind. However, I continued to have very disturbing feelings about letting her go. I went to the Lord about it and felt assured that I should let her go.

As the day arrived for her to leave, I took her to the place where we agreed to meet them. As I loaded her gear into the back of the Gardner’s truck, I had a sick feeling that I would lever see Melissa alive again. I continued to pray in my heart however and felt assured I should let her go. I just hugged her and told her to be careful. Sterling Gardner assured me she would be well taken care of. I let her go.

That evening, we had been invited to a party at some friends. Around 9 pm that evening I got a call on my cell phone (I don’t even remember who had called me), informing me that Melissa had been involved in a serious Jet Ski accident and needed to go to a hospital with a plastic surgeon. We had the choice of Life Flighting her to Salt Lake City, or having her driven by the Gardners to Saint George. I asked the Gardner’s which choice they would make under the circumstances? We agreed on having them drive her to Saint George.

We were told that she had had an accident with a ski rope and that she had a cut on her cheek and a pretty serious rope burn. Ann and I left immediately for Saint George. We were very worried and drove as quickly as possible. As we drove, I prayed and pondered a lot. As I did, I convinced myself that the injuries were not very serious. This was still in the early days of cellular service and phones only worked in more populated areas. I had to stop regularly to phone the hospital to see if she had arrived. As we came into Cedar City we learned that she had arrived but they couldn’t begin treating her until we gave our consent.

When we arrived at the Hospital, I can’t describe the great trepidation I felt to enter. Nothing could have prepared me for what I saw when I entered the emergency room. The injury was much worse than I had ever expected. She had a very deep rope burn completely around her face; across the back of her neck, and onto her chest. The rope had also cut deep into her left cheek.

It was all I could do to hold her hand and tell her she was going to be fine and that it wasn’t that bad. I wanted to be upbeat around her and make her feel safe. After a couple of minutes however, I excused myself to the restroom where I wept uncontrollably for at least ten minutes.

The story was told to me that she and Sage hopped on the Jet Skis shortly after arriving at the lake. It was late in the afternoon and the sun was low on the horizon. As a result, the sun reflected off the lake, and Melissa couldn’t see what was in front of her. Each on separate watercrafts, Melissa and Sage headed directly into the sun. Melissa didn’t see a boat, towing a water skier, directly in front of her. She went directly between the boat and the skier and hit the rope. The skier saw her and tried to lift the rope to allow her to slip underneath: She took a direct hit in her open mouth. The force pulled the rope out of the skier’s hands and the rope proceeded to wrap itself completely around her head. With the boat and the Jet Ski still moving, the force broke the handle off the rope but then pulled off in a whipping action that caused the frayed end to whip across her chest and cut deep burns into her face.

The plastic surgeon told us that the rope burns were third degree burns. The burns were very deep and went from the corners of her mouth, across her cheeks, directly under both ear lobes, and behind her neck. The back of her neck was raw flesh. The swelling was terrible: Her head seemed to be twice the size of normal. She looked awful.

The surgeon proceeded to sew up the cut into her cheek. It was a cut that went essentially an inch into her cheek; thus making her mouth an inch wider. The surgeon told us he didn’t have a treatment for the burns. He proceeded to tell us that there was no way of knowing how these burns would heal. We simply needed to give it time. He said it could very well heal with little scarring, or could heal with the large thick skin that is more often associated with third degree burns. We were instructed to take her to the Primary Children’s burn clinic when we got back to Salt Lake.

She was released from the Hospital that morning early. We went to my brother Jim’s Saint George house for what was the rest of the night. When we got there, I proceeded to give Melissa a Priesthood blessing. Then I went to be alone to pray. The next several hours were filled with countless pleadings and countless tears: Over and over again I asked myself why I had let her go? More importantly I wanted to know why the Lord had assured me it was okay to let her go.

Sometime over the next few hours or days, as my prayers were sent out on behalf of my beautiful little daughter, the Spirit of the Lord came over me in a very calming assurance. “Scott, I too know the pain of allowing one of my children to go into certain harm… and sending them anyway. This lesson is for you.” In a very real sense, I had a small understanding of how hard it was for Heavenly Father to send his Son to die when he knew what would happen to him.

The blessing I gave Melissa that night assured me that she would be healed without scars. To this day, Melissa has very faint lines of where this accident took place. If someone didn’t know about the accident, they would never notice the scars. Their faint remainder are a reminder to me of the scars my Savior still bears as a witness of the love of God for me.

As a result of this accident, I have become a different parent. I have learned to trust God much more. I have come to the realization that I am not in charge and that I have no control over serious events happening in my life, or the life of those I love. All I have, and all safety and protection lies in the hands of the Lord. I have learned that I need to trust him to protect me and my children. If he doesn’t, there is a reason for it—that I am certain of.

As the school year drew to an end that year, and as I continued teaching seminary, things seemed to be going extremely well. My students liked me and it appeared that those in influential places did as well. I was evaluated and interviewed by all the necessary people. When it was all said and done—I wasn’t hired by the church. I was very hurt.

Looking back on this seminary teaching experience, I know that the Lord’s hand was in the decision. I am certain it wasn’t the right thing for me. However, it was very difficult for me. Brother Iba, the CES Zone Leader that lived across the street from me was very apologetic. He gave me a big hug of thanks when we returned to Maryland.

I didn’t know how much this rejection affected me at the time, but again in hind-sight I see that I turned a little bitter for the next couple of years. I found myself suffering spiritually due to a feeling of “what’s the use”? I found myself more susceptible to temptation as a result and made some poor decisions. It seemed I was doing all the right things for all the right reasons. I couldn’t understand why I wasn’t hired.

With several years between then and now, I have a real perspective of the many lessons I learned from this experience. I know I wouldn’t be where I am today without these experiences. I can honestly say now that I am grateful for the Lord having a better understanding of the “big picture”. I have a greater understanding of the gospel and of the Atonement.